Start With What’s Good – Focus on Strengths ©

Imagine you arrive home from work after a long day. Your spouse is waiting for you when you get home. He asks you to grab a cup of coffee and to meet him in the home office. You do what he asks and you find him sitting across the table, waiting for you to take your seat. You sit down and he says, "I've been thinking about your performance over the last 6 months and I've come up with a list of things you need to improve. Let me run down the list and let's come up with a development plan."

And what would be your response? "What the - #?@! Are you kidding me?! After all I do around here, this is what you have for me?!" If you're like anyone I know, you wouldn't be happy.

The question is, would this ever really happen? The answer: It happens in companies every day. Most managers focus on what's bad about employees, not what's good about them. For many managers, it's not all their fault. This is what they have been taught: Focus on the weaknesses and an employee will get better.

Well, they've been taught wrong. Why would this strategy succeed at work and fail miserably at home? It won't. We resent unbalanced feedback, and we feel shortchanged, and unappreciated when our managers, or loved ones put the spotlight only on our faults.

This is a serious issue in business. Do you know why most employees leave companies? If you answered money, try again. Money consistently comes in third place or lower. Research shows that the number one answer most often given is, "I left because of my boss."

Don Clifton, former CEO of the Gallup Organization, and Jim Harter, Gallup's Chief Scientist, discovered in their research that "the greatest gains in human development are based on investment in what people do best." Martin Seligman, co-founder of Positive Psychology, has found through his research that people who engage their strengths are not only more successful, they are happier.

Consider the Miami Heat, the new champions of the NBA. Shaquille O'Neill is one of the worst free-throw shooters in the history of the NBA, yet he led the Heat to their first championship ever. Did Miami win by O'Neill increasing his free-throw shooting percentage by just under 1% (he went from 46.1% to 46.9%), or did they do it by leveraging his talent and letting other players, like Dwayne Wade, bring out their best game?

We know the answers. Success comes when people do what they do best. If you don't get this, you'll be the reason your employees leave your company. You'll be the reason your children don't want to be around you. Focusing only on weaknesses leads to bad results.

So what can you do right now if you're a manager or a parent? Start by looking for what your employees, or your children do well. What do they love to do? When do they succeed? What strengths do they use most? Then give them more opportunities to use these strengths. Look for ways they can apply them. Partner them with people who can help them do their best even better, and work around their lesser strengths. And don't forget to tell them, "I know what you do around here and I appreciate it."

Imagine what your company would be like, and what it would be like at home if everyone focused first on what's good.

David J. Pollay, MAPP, is the founder and president of The Momentum Project, an organization dedicated to increasing the positive momentum of their business clients. Email your thoughts and stories to: david @ themomentumproject.com.