How to Date a Single Dad

How to Date a Single Dad
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Overview
It happens for many women: You meet a great guy, only to find out he's got to get home and put his kids to bed. It can be strange terrain for someone who has never dated a single dad before, but the reality for aging singles is that as time goes by, your odds of meeting an interesting man with kids goes up. It may not always be easy, but it can be manageable as long as you prepare yourself and keep in mind that even when he's your boyfriend, he's still a parent.
Step 1
Relax when he calls to cancel at the last minute. Yes, maybe he's making something up, but you never know with children. Urgent situations can and do come up, and you'll have to learn to deal with them if you want to continue dating him.
Step 2
Listen to him talk about his kids. A dad who talks about his kids is a dad who cares. And if he's telling you about his children, chances are he wants you to care, too.
Step 3
Help him spend wisely. He probably doesn't have as much free-flowing cash as other single men you have dated. Don't push him outside his financial comfort zone. Instead, learn to have fun within it.
Step 4
Ask about the children's mother. Find out about the custody arrangement, why things didn't work out, and how he handles and explains the situation to his children.
Step 5
Don't push to meet the kids, and don't take offense if it takes a while. Odds are it's more because of his kids than you---children of broken homes already struggle with stability, and introducing strangers can disrupt their sense of security and normalcy.
Step 6
Plan outings and activities that include the kids. If you want to share a life with him, he and the children are a package deal. Spend time with them so you can all grow comfortable with each other---it may take longer than you think, particularly if they have trust issues. Save your romantic evenings for when the kids are out of his custody.
skill
3
tip
Be sure to give your boyfriend time alone with his kids, particularly if his custody time is limited.
tips
Be sure to give your boyfriend time alone with his kids, particularly if his custody time is limited.
warning
Don't become a babysitter or take on his chores wholesale. You may want to be a part of the family, but if you're a new girlfriend, they're his kids, not yours.
warnings
Don't become a babysitter or take on his chores wholesale. You may want to be a part of the family, but if you're a new girlfriend, they're his kids, not yours.
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Resources
reference
Match.com: Dating a Single Dad?
reference
CNN.com: Go Ahead---Date a Single Dad