The “honey, don’t” list

Now, you need to know that I often get a "honey, don't" list from my wife rather than the lauded "honey, do" list. Some common examples include, "Honey, don't try and put that bathroom sink in yourself; call some one who has done it before." Another is "Honey, we do need a new patio, but why don't we hire a contractor to do that?"

Indeed, I am not adept at carpentry, electricity, plumbing or roofing. But believe you me, it's not to say that I can't do some aspects of all of the above, but unfortunately, common sense and patience often escapes me while proceeding. I know my friends cringe when they ask me for help, and I also know that my main lot in life at these projects is to be a gopher. I've come to expect that and realize that I may never achieve a high status in the construction and maintenance field. The "Rick, you da man!" comments will most likely only be uttered after I save a box full of nails from tipping over—rather then coming up with an ingenious plan to erect an addition from scratch.

Yet my status in home improvement rose a bit after being asked to assist in erecting a storage shed for relatives. After six hours of hauling, cutting, measuring, drilling and ratcheting, the five members of this weekend building crew were nearing the crucial stage of rafter construction. All the drills, including mine, had been used extensively and were almost perspiring from the constant use. Thus, as the rafter section began, most of the drills were wearing down quicker and quicker.

Except one that is—I had purchased a rather expensive but "on sale" cordless kit a few weeks earlier and had brought it along on its first mission away from the minor futzing I had subjected it to. As the rafters began to take shape, the drilling and ratcheting began to rely more and more on this one drill because of its power and seemingly tireless effort.

In short, the job was finished successfully that day due in part (I have to say) because of the uniqueness of this one piece of equipment. Plus, I was hailed as, "Da Man!" at the end of the day, and even though it was due to my purchase rather then my expertise, I still consider it an added bonus.

Maybe now my wife's list might read, "Honey, do by a new tool every so often okay?"