All-Star Kids Learn From MVP Parents

What character traits do you want your children to have? Their character traits define who they are, how they act and react, and have bearing on every aspect of their lives both now and in the future. More than personality, character is who we really are.

Dr. Tim Kimmel, a noted family expert says there are six character traits we must build into our children's lives: faith, integrity, poise, self-discipline, endurance and courage.

Faith gives them the wonderful gift of hope, both in others and in God. I wouldn't want to live my life without hope and I certainly wouldn't wish that on my children. Faith gives them the ability to see beyond their circumstances, which will not always be to their liking. It gives purpose, goals, and allows us to have healthy relationships with others.

Integrity comes from the mathematical term, integer, which is a whole number. A person with integrity is the same no matter the circumstances. He is honest in his dealings and respectful to others. He is not two-faced.

Poise is the ability to stay calm in difficult situations. Our children need the ability to keep their heads even when those around them are losing theirs. A poised person has a sense of what is appropriate behavior in each situation.

Self-discipline is the hook on which all of the other character traits hang. Simply put, self-discipline is the ability to delay gratification. I like that definition because it shows that the pleasure or reward is on its way, but waiting for the right moment makes it even better. In a world full of instant gratification, people with self-discipline savor the full flavor that life offers. On any given day, my kids would probably prefer to stay in bed to sleep a little longer (okay, a lot longer), but getting up and going to school offers a much better life later - it delays the gratification, but produces it in fuller measure when it comes to fruition. A life without self-control is a life of frustration, bad decisions, trouble and heartache.

Endurance means we can stick with it. If our children give up at the first - or second - sign of opposition, they will never achieve their goals or fulfill their purposes. Every person will face difficulty with nearly every worth-while task he attempts. The quitters never win, but winners never quit.

Finally, courage has been defined as doing what is right, even when you are afraid. Courage is often portrayed in the movies as not being afraid at all, but true courage deals with facing a daunting challenge or fear. Our children will face difficult and even scary situations, but if they have courage they will take the right course of action. Owning up to a wrong, going to the dentist or doctor, taking a stand for what is right, learning a new skill; all of these require good, old-fashioned American courage.

So how do we instill these character traits in our children? I recently heard a speaker say we should be M.V.P. parents. M is for modeling behavior. Character traits are mostly caught, not taught. Our children are watching us and will emulate what they see us do. They are watching how we act - and how we react to what the world throws at us. V is for vocalizing what we believe and expect from them. P is for providing opportunities for them to put into action what we have taught them. It is showing that we have faith in them as they earn our trust.

Are you an M.V.P. parent? What character traits are you instilling into your children?

You can contact Craig Harris at www.apparentlyso.net.