Purifying energy into the positive
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By Judith Orloff, M.D.

By Judith Orloff M.D.
Our relationships at work are governed by a give and take of energy. Some coworkers make us more electric or at ease. Yet others suck the life right out of us. As a physician and energy specialist, I want to verify that energy vampires roam the workplace sapping our exuberance. But most of us don’t know how to cope with vampires, so we mope around as unwitting casualties, enduring a preventable fatigue.
Here are some types of energy vampires to watch for at work and ways to deal with them:
Vampire #1—The Sob Sister: She’s the whining coworker with the “poor me” attitude who’s more interested in complaining than solutions.
How to Protect Yourself—Set clear boundaries. Limit the time you spend talking about her complaints. Sensitively say, “I’m sorry I can only talk for a few minutes today.” And go on with your work.
Vampire #2—The Drama Queen: This vampire has a flair for exaggerating small incidents into off-the-chart dramas which exhaust you.
How to Protect Yourself: A drama queen doesn’t get mileage out of equanimity. Stay calm. Take a few deep breaths. This will help you not get caught up in the histrionics.
Vampire #3—The Constant Talker or Joke Teller: A chronic motor mouth, he has no interest in your feelings; he’s only concerned with himself. You wait for an opening to get a word in edgewise but it never comes.
How to Protect Yourself: These people don’t respond to nonverbal cues. You must speak up and interrupt. Politely say, “I’m a quiet person, so please excuse me for not talking a long time—more constructive than expressing frustration.
Vampire #4—The Fixer Upper: She turns you into her therapist, desperate for you to fix her endless problems. At lunch, she’ll make a b-line to your desk, monopolizing your free time. Her neediness lures you in.
How to Protect Yourself: Do not become the “rescuer.” Show empathy but resist offering solutions to not reinforce this behavior.
Vampire #4—The Blamer: This vampire has a sneaky way of making you feel guilty or lacking for not getting things just right. She always has a negative comment to make.
How to Protect Yourself: Try this visualization. Around this person imagine yourself surrounded by a cocoon of white light, a protective covering. Tell yourself that you are safe and secure so you can’t be depleted.
Vampire #5—Go For the Jugular Fiend: This type is intentionally vindictive and/or verbally abusive. It’s hard to get these hurtful jabs out of your head.
How to Protect Yourself: Eliminate them from your life whenever possible. If this is your boss, try a visualization that puts you at a distance from him. If you can’t switch jobs, realize he’s a wounded person; don’t take his meanness personally.
Happy News columnist, Judith Orloff M.D., is a psychiatrist and the author of the new book Positive Energy: Ten Extraordinary Prescriptions for Transforming Fatigue, Stress, and Fear Into Vibrance, Strength, and Love , upon which this article is based.
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