‘I once caught a fish THIS big.’

By Jason Tanamor

Happynews Citizen Journalist

There's a proverb that says, "Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime." Unless, of course, the fish in question is a 646 pound catfish. Then they could eat for several days, plus have something left to give to their neighbors.

Last May, Thai fishermen did the impossible - they caught a 646 pound catfish. Talk about bragging rights.

My question is, how in the world did they reel it in?

Because once the hook(s?) attach onto the giant catfish, the fishermen aren't catching the fish. Rather, the fish has caught the fishermen. Then it's hold on for dear life.

Apparently, the giant Mekong catfish, which measured nine feet long, died shortly after being caught (probably from shock), according to an article by the Associated Press.

The article said, "The fishermen had hoped to sell the fish to environmental groups, which planned to release it to spawn upriver, but it died before it could be handed over and then was chopped up and sold in pieces to villagers as food."

So, let me get this straight. It was planned on being released to spawn upriver, but since it died, it was chopped up and sold for food. Was there nothing in between?

Was there no: "Let's donate it to science so we can understand this species better?"

Did officials say: "We're going to release it so it can create offspring. Oh. Wait. It's dead. Anyone got an enormous grill? I sure do love grilled catfish."

"I agree. I have a case of Keystone Light in my trunk. Fire it up."

I'd hate to have these officials plan my funeral. That's disaster waiting to happen. Or a cookout.

The AP article also said the catfish was critically endangered and that its population has dropped 80 percent over the past 13 years.

Having known this, I think the fishermen should have thrown it back. They should, however, be rewarded for accomplishing the feat, and the good thing is that people were fed some tasty food, even though it was at the expense of a humongous catfish.

Jason Tanamor is an award-winning writer and humor columnist. His articles have appeared in more than 250 publications worldwide. He's the editor of Zoiks! Online, a contributing writer for Pulse Magazine, and the author of Burrito, Illinois, and For all the wrong reasons. His website is www.tanamor.com.

This story was produced by a Happynews Citizen Journalist.

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